Go get mommy a cocktail.
I don't like candy. It dulls my anger.
Your screaming child makes me happy I'm on the pill.
"...And then I shot him and put him in my trunk."
Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder.
Every time I see a child hysterically crying I want to say - Relax kid. It's gonna get so much worse.
No I haven't seen the Kardashians.
Fool me once shame on you...
I can't live each day as if it were my last.
If you try to kill me with kindness, I will come back from the grave and stab you.